Turning 29

I turn 29 today and I just wanted to take the opportunity to thank God for His goodness and his mercy with me. Lately I have been feeling a little tired, I believe is because I have been working O.T. on weekends. But I thank God that I do have a job when there are many people looking for one and not being able to find one.

On Sunday I went to the first service at church. At my church, we have 4 services on Sundays and I always go to the second one, but this time I decided to try the early one. It was different. Usually when I arrive at the second service, getting a parking space is hard, and then inside getting a seat is also hard. Not this time. I was able to park just next to the church and I was able to sit downstairs towards the middle. The message was good but not as good as when my pastor preaches. He usually preaches at the second service.

Going back to my birthday, it's amazing how time passes by so quickly. I can still remember when I was praying to get out of high school, so many things have happened since then, so many adjustments and changes. But I feel good, there are still some things to do and accomplish. Of course the thought of..."ohh my I am getting old"...creeps into my mind, but I know many things can still be done. When I look at my older brothers I think they still look young and they are already 35 and 36. So one more year before I reach my third decade of life. I will try to enjoy as much as possible this last twenty something year.

When I look back I have to thank God because He has given me a good life and He has kept me safe. I had the opportunity of accepting Jesus when I was fairly young. I see that as a blessing because I believe that I have been spared of a lot of sadness and difficulties in life. Sadness and difficulties that just come from being apart from God. Through the years I've understood that the limits God sets for us in His word are for our benefit and not our discomfort. I once read a story that illustrated this very clearly. It went something like this: there where these 2 boys visiting relatives for the first time in a ranch or farm. They went outside and explored the woods just beyond a fenced-in pasture. After they had walked around the pasture for a few minutes they came up with a brilliant idea...why not climb under the barbwired fence and cut across the pasture to the pond? It sounded like a good idea and it would save them time and the distance they would have to walk would be shorter. They glanced from one side of the pasture to the other and they only saw a herd of cattle quietly grazing at the other end. Confident that they were safe, they lifted up the wire, crawled under, and began walking toward their destination. For some reason one of the boys looked back to see a charging Brahma bull. So they had to run and crawl again underneath the fence to safety, they peered up to see the cattle standing just across the fence staring at them. What had appeared to be a hindrance, something that stood in their way, was there for their protection and safety. What had been a nuisance a few minutes earlier was a welcome barrier between them and the bull now. The hindrance became their safety. There is always a why connected to the what. Why was the fence put there? Was it to get in their way and make them walk farther? No, it was put there to protect them from the animals. Isn't the story a great illustration? I believe it is, so we have to take the time to find out why God has given us certain rules and boundaries. If we understand this it will help us with our obedience. How like us humans to disregard whatever limits God has set for us in His word, right? We have to understand that God only wants what is good for us, even though it doesn't look good to us at the time. So I thank God for this lesson and for allowing me to understand it.

I have also understood that life without God is no life at all, even if you have everything else here on this earth. When you are apart from God you sin and the wage of sin is death. Spiritual and emotional death. No way of living a life. I also thank God because He touched my mom in a way that she understood that she needed Him without a doubt. When my mom accepted Jesus the percentage of evangelicals here in Panama was very small. Evangelical Christians were seen as crazy, poor, uneducated people. That perception has changed some over the years. But God was good enough with us to allow us to see and understand the truth even though at the time we didn't have any problems (at least what people would consider as problems), we were living a very comfortable life, no hardships at all. Nobody was sick, or depressed or anything. People generally seek God when they are going through some type of trouble. That was not our case. He did prepared us for when the trouble came many, many years later. I believe that if we wouldn't have been Christians, when we were going through the really hard times, my father might have tried to harm himself. Even though now we have enough money just to live, no extraordinary amenities. I prefer it to what my dad went through when the business was doing really bad. Those were hard years.

Let me explain a little. At that time my dad was under tremendous stress. There were a lot of debts and no money to cover them. I specially remember one time...it was December 7th, one day before December 8th. The best day at the restaurant was December 8th, mother's day here in Panama. We would make thousands of dollars that day. Well...in the early morning hours of that Dec. 8th (1997) my mom woke me up saying that we had to pray for my father. I was very drowsy, but I was instantly alert when I entered my parents bedroom. I saw my dad laying down on the carpeted floor in front of their bed. I was wondering..."what is he doing on the floor?". My mom said we had to pray -- then I saw he was crying -- my dad doesn't cry unless is something really serious ( :-)...unlike me), so I was shocked. I started praying asking God to please help him. He then grabbed my hand in a very tight grip and crying told me that he couldn't move and that he could feel he was going to die. Something just snapped in me and I started praying very intensely along with my mom, I could feel the spiritual battle being waged and it was almost like if you could feel death around us. Rebuking demons and any spiritual powers among us. Then I remember my dad asking for my older brother. He wanted to give him instructions for the business and for the family. At the time my brother and his family were living with us. When my brother came, my dad grabbed his hand and started giving him instructions between sobs. He tried to stand up and he couldn't, he couldn't move. We were all worried, but we kept on praying, I was almost hoarse at the end. We prayed like for an hour. Then my dad started moving a little bit, my brother help him get up and walk to the bed. At that time I felt a certainty that he was not going to die and that God had been with us through it all. I have never felt before or after that time, that sense of oppression. After that we've never had anything quite as serious as that time, but sometimes my mom still woke me up during the night to pray for my dad because sometimes he couldn't breath or he couldn't sleep. Those were times in which he was like tormented. Of course I saw this as a very strong spiritual battle.

I thank God also because he has spared my life twice in situations in which I could have easily lost it. My house once was burglarized and another time I was at a store in which they came in at that time to rob. In both of them I was not harmed. In one of them specially, they could have done with me whatever they wanted as they were inside my house like for 45 minutes. I thank God I was not raped or beaten or something like that, as I know what people can do. In the one at my house I was 15 years old and the one at the store I was 18 years old. In the one at my house they did held me at gunpoint and yelled at me a lot, but besides that, nothing serious. So I thank God for His infinite mercy towards me.

I thank God also because He has allowed me to travel. I love it. It's amazing to learn about other cultures and visiting new places. I haven't been able to do it in the last few years because of the financial situation we are going through, but I know this will not last forever and the opportunity will come up again sometime. Among some places the Lord has allowed me to visit are: Miami, FL; Orlando, FL; St. Augustine, FL; Los Angeles, CA; Oahu, Hawaii; Cancun, Mexico; DF, Mexico; Cartagena, Colombia; Bogota, Colombia; Nassau, Bahamas; Trinidad & Tobago and Seoul, Korea. Whenever God gives me the opportunity of traveling again I will take it. It doesn't matter where it is.

There are many other things to thank God for, my family, my friends (here in Panama and outside of Panama), my job, my relationship with Him, my health...so God has been very good to me my first 28 years of my life. I can't wait to see what He has prepared for the next couple of years. Whatever it might be Father...I thank you in advance.